I was thirteen years old when I walked into a courtroom to testify against my biological father, the man whose abuse kept me imprisoned in trauma for years. For the 1,835 days I suffered, he received 31,776 consecutive days to be served in contemplation. The moment the gavel struck the judicial bench, my family and I sprung to our feet with utter shock. I looked my perpetrator in the eye that day, but the biggest relief was looking my family in the eye knowing justice was served. We did not say anything at all, yet there was an instant impact of our bodies colliding as we wrapped ourselves together like branches from a tree. That was the moment I knew—what I hadn’t known until I knew, as
I know now.
I am a future psychologist.
I lived years in that courtroom, wondering how. How could one event shape who I am and who I am to become? There have been many moments in my life where I have been faced with the same dilemma; I either let what happened to me destroy me or save me. Some days I am not fine. But with the help of Pathways, I have found meaning in the anguish.
I don’t believe I chose my future profession. I’ve always been a wanderer; seeking out the deeper meaning of life’s experiences. Despite every attempt to run from psychology, it has found me through people, places, and even objects. The way I can articulate any emotion as if I am the emotion itself. The same way I have been given a gift to attract wounded souls, just as mine once was, to help them heal. I have found I can be anywhere in the world and psychology will inevitably find me. If psychology is a dance, then I am the observer. If psychology is a map, then I am the traveler. But, if psychology is anything at all, it is the art of understanding. The fact is, I did not choose psychology, it chose me. My past gives me purpose, my present gives me healing, and my future gives me meaning, all thanks to the support from Pathways.
